Okay. So this is how the new year started.
I spent few days with few best guys I've ever know and turned out it was great. As I expected, which is at least I'm not stuck at home when year changes. Plus with my grades which are not that bad. Well, I should say 2014 started pretty good, without any shocking or bad news told until...........................this afternoon.
I forget I already mentioned about my internship before or not hahaha (blame my short term memory), but IT WAS CANCELLED. FREAKING TWO DAYS BEFORE THE-SHOULD-BE-MY-FIRST-DAY-WORKING. NICE, WELL PLAYED CORPORATE, WELL-PLAYED.
YES I'M A LIIIIITTLE BIT PISSED OF RIGHT NOW. LIIIIIIIIIIIIIITLE BIT. WHY? OH NOTHING, IT'S JUST BECAUSE OF THE INTERVIEW I MISSED MY HOLIDAY BOTH IN SINGAPORE AND DIENG, I DIDN'T COME BACK TO MALANG ASAP LIKE I ALWAYS DID, AND I WAS HAPPY! A REAL HAPPINESS WHICH I NEVER FELT BEFORE. NICE, RIGHT?
Little bit freaked out and called my mom, and cried. Hahaha that's that, my crybaby-ness.
Okay. I think it's enough to spill my anger to anyone I know and reckoned. I had enough of anger and sad. As usual, everyone just said: semangat. Bukan rezeki. Kok bisa?
I really appreciate those things but really, I am shocked and very very very disappointed towards them. So, I guess I'm sorry for what I did back hours ago which I think not very nice to people which really supported me.
Yeah God, You know what's best. I'm walking on your path and still very thankful towards everything that happened.
Jumat, 03 Januari 2014
Sabtu, 28 Desember 2013
END OF 2013
Well, another almost-one-year-blog-post since the last one. I DID plan to post everything about my Dubai journey, but plan just only planned. Turns out I never really tend to do that. Forgiven.
Years passed, and so 2013. I never had any so-called "New Year Resolution" because I always think: yeah, me at this year is good. Quite good. Acceptable. At least for my self. Really, I am an ambitious person towards my face outside, not for my self pleasure. Resolution comes to me as a legal or better way to put your old self to trash and push it with a new one. I think what we've learned about our bad side a year before sometimes good, at least you know you are a human. When you always try to perfecting your self, kinda makes me creeping out. What are you trying to get after being perfect?
WELL THOSE ARE MY THOUGHT IN FRONT OF MY OWN MIRROR. Fell free to say "you moron", "you doesn't think", whatever as long someone out there think that are true. Yeah that's counted as me.
To sum up this year, can be done only one word: BLESSED.
God always blessed us each time, each place, everything we do, as long as on its right path. I tasted living beneath worldwide youngster. I tasted hosting some guys from another country. I pushed my own limit by taking this semester credit. I went to some places for family holiday. But the best of all is: I AM AN INTERN. How good is that?
Too much things I got this year. And I always try to thank Him, to thank everyone who somehow helps me with this steep world. I won't resist that my achievement so far is helped by another, but, sorry if it seems to be so damn narcissistic, but I do believe most of it also came from my own hard work(s).
That's my friend, is the biggest lesson I studied this year. It's not as simple as: you want, just take it. It's more like: you want, work your ass on it! Never feel enough, never feel satisfied. Envy your friend, learn from them! Working hard is the key!
I hope 2014 also be a blessed year for me, and us all. I guess, if there are new year resolution, I simply said: I want to be thankful as much as today exactly one year for now. Amen.
Years passed, and so 2013. I never had any so-called "New Year Resolution" because I always think: yeah, me at this year is good. Quite good. Acceptable. At least for my self. Really, I am an ambitious person towards my face outside, not for my self pleasure. Resolution comes to me as a legal or better way to put your old self to trash and push it with a new one. I think what we've learned about our bad side a year before sometimes good, at least you know you are a human. When you always try to perfecting your self, kinda makes me creeping out. What are you trying to get after being perfect?
WELL THOSE ARE MY THOUGHT IN FRONT OF MY OWN MIRROR. Fell free to say "you moron", "you doesn't think", whatever as long someone out there think that are true. Yeah that's counted as me.
To sum up this year, can be done only one word: BLESSED.
God always blessed us each time, each place, everything we do, as long as on its right path. I tasted living beneath worldwide youngster. I tasted hosting some guys from another country. I pushed my own limit by taking this semester credit. I went to some places for family holiday. But the best of all is: I AM AN INTERN. How good is that?
Too much things I got this year. And I always try to thank Him, to thank everyone who somehow helps me with this steep world. I won't resist that my achievement so far is helped by another, but, sorry if it seems to be so damn narcissistic, but I do believe most of it also came from my own hard work(s).
That's my friend, is the biggest lesson I studied this year. It's not as simple as: you want, just take it. It's more like: you want, work your ass on it! Never feel enough, never feel satisfied. Envy your friend, learn from them! Working hard is the key!
I hope 2014 also be a blessed year for me, and us all. I guess, if there are new year resolution, I simply said: I want to be thankful as much as today exactly one year for now. Amen.
Kamis, 24 Oktober 2013
Defining Self-Satifaction
One thing I still remember from my precious stories back in Dubai is, how can you live in with an unsatisfied feeling. Until....death comes. Hahaha that's sound terribly scary but, gotta admit that there's true though.
Well, life has been so kind to me these days but I try to never, ever, ever admit it. Or think about it (even now I'm writing it, it's contradictory-- I know). Because if you do it, or just me maybe, I'll feel satisfied. Cannot do anything else beside thinking how graceful things I already got. And for me once again, that's a stupid thing to do.
When I told this to someone, he said this is not a good thing. Beside of my religion principle which enforce us to always feel satisfy all the time, he said it will pressuring me all the time. Yeah that's obvious, but now when I think about it I feel a little bit horrified. Turns out I want to be pressured- whatever it is- whenever, wherever. Can you imagine how hard is that? Like your soul being sucking up with Dementor (yes, currently I begin to re-read again each Harry Potter series novel- thank you for being there, library).
I was a carefree people, yeah for me, I don't care since that's relative to everyone. But now I can't imagine how I'll spend my days off without my task or laptop. When I looked at my friend, they just easily do something fun without any pressure that that's pointless or doesn't have any result. And me- currently feel- I can't do that. I never find myself in coffee shop for my own leisure time like I always do back before, always accompanied by laptop, or pen, or whatsoever related to my college life. Maybe if my soul came out from my body and see my own self, I'll throw out so easily. Well, now gotta realize that each part of myself never connected. How sad is that.
Still, there's a speculation that my current condition is because I just got out from my midterm week (which is also scary because I'm not feel thrilled. You can say maybe happy-- less happy than before). And pile of tasks still waiting to be done. So it enforces me to go this way. I hope holiday come soon and I'll be able to find what joy and leisure time is.
Tanto tiempo!
Well, life has been so kind to me these days but I try to never, ever, ever admit it. Or think about it (even now I'm writing it, it's contradictory-- I know). Because if you do it, or just me maybe, I'll feel satisfied. Cannot do anything else beside thinking how graceful things I already got. And for me once again, that's a stupid thing to do.
When I told this to someone, he said this is not a good thing. Beside of my religion principle which enforce us to always feel satisfy all the time, he said it will pressuring me all the time. Yeah that's obvious, but now when I think about it I feel a little bit horrified. Turns out I want to be pressured- whatever it is- whenever, wherever. Can you imagine how hard is that? Like your soul being sucking up with Dementor (yes, currently I begin to re-read again each Harry Potter series novel- thank you for being there, library).
I was a carefree people, yeah for me, I don't care since that's relative to everyone. But now I can't imagine how I'll spend my days off without my task or laptop. When I looked at my friend, they just easily do something fun without any pressure that that's pointless or doesn't have any result. And me- currently feel- I can't do that. I never find myself in coffee shop for my own leisure time like I always do back before, always accompanied by laptop, or pen, or whatsoever related to my college life. Maybe if my soul came out from my body and see my own self, I'll throw out so easily. Well, now gotta realize that each part of myself never connected. How sad is that.
Still, there's a speculation that my current condition is because I just got out from my midterm week (which is also scary because I'm not feel thrilled. You can say maybe happy-- less happy than before). And pile of tasks still waiting to be done. So it enforces me to go this way. I hope holiday come soon and I'll be able to find what joy and leisure time is.
Tanto tiempo!
Minggu, 08 September 2013
The Other Side
I do believe there is Yin and Yang. There are two sides of coin. There'll be a good time and a bad time. Me in my last post seems so....desperate. Hahaha we need time to adapt tho.
Well, today I got paid off. Simply happy with this event, when our seniors had their graduation. And as a junior, we have this obligation to make such a party for them. This time 2012 is on their role!
It was great! The event, the people, everything seems so right at that moment. We laughed, took MANY pictures, dance, sang, ate, everything. My desperate last week seems already paid off. I know I complained much about my friends lately, but one thing sure I know that they are fun. I can forget about my rigid world for seconds, play like a child, laugh like there aren't any obligation (and yes, tomorrow I will debut as an assistant, 8 am).
I hope this story will bring you up when you're down next time, Mitha. Remember that people around you have their own positive and negative side. Accept it because they are human and your friends! Let it flow, they said. If they wrong, make it right. If they lack of something, then tell. Never tell lies, never hide anything, that's friendship.
It's pretty late and I think I write this with my half consciousness. Well then good night!
Well, today I got paid off. Simply happy with this event, when our seniors had their graduation. And as a junior, we have this obligation to make such a party for them. This time 2012 is on their role!
It was great! The event, the people, everything seems so right at that moment. We laughed, took MANY pictures, dance, sang, ate, everything. My desperate last week seems already paid off. I know I complained much about my friends lately, but one thing sure I know that they are fun. I can forget about my rigid world for seconds, play like a child, laugh like there aren't any obligation (and yes, tomorrow I will debut as an assistant, 8 am).
I hope this story will bring you up when you're down next time, Mitha. Remember that people around you have their own positive and negative side. Accept it because they are human and your friends! Let it flow, they said. If they wrong, make it right. If they lack of something, then tell. Never tell lies, never hide anything, that's friendship.
It's pretty late and I think I write this with my half consciousness. Well then good night!
Sabtu, 31 Agustus 2013
Empty
This summer holiday is just too much! So much happiness, laughter, experience, new friends. That's why the title is Empty. When you got happiness too much, then it leaves you, you just an empty shell.
I've never felt so sad like this before. I thought I already adapted, fit in here, but this loneliness kills me from inside.
In Malang, when I woke up in the morning, there are my mom, my sister, my brother, my cousin, I have someone to talk to. I have something that I can do every morning. Even though it's just go to market, go to gym, at least I have companion. Even in Dubai I have Michelle, she had been my companion every time in Dubai. From morning to another morning. It's nice to have someone to talk to. I have my friends, who always be there when I'm bored. It's like, wherever you are you'll be with somebody who accompanied you.
This just too sad. My plan before at Depok for the first time is to blogged my story this holiday. But too sad to post something that happy.
Now I'm just complaining too much. Hahaha. Face it Mitha, this is your life.
Minggu, 24 Maret 2013
Water of March
So why jazz now? 8 pm in my room seems comic time not jazz time (lol).
Tomorrow is my 4th midterm. Time flies, huh? After this I will begin my 3rd year. Welcoming new freshmen. Welcoming the real life. It seems like yesterday when I had my first midterm (at that time I scared to death anyway hahaha).
I'm stuck baby! Baby I'm stuck. I've studying so long but it seems like everyone still much better than me. And the theory about coding, professionalism, just flying above my head with no intention to alight in it. Ouhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
It gets worst with my low devotion about it, yes I do study five minutes than change to my pad, and minesweeper! Told you and believe: that is the best game ever created! I wonder why people choose PES (yes, I am freak and I don't care lalala).
Yes this game, yes.
Actually my sight now only awake a watt which I can fall asleep anytime. But because this minesweeper I could awake until 3 am (for me it is a very rare, rare, thing). Everyone who saw always ask 'wow, you can?' 'I thought it just lucky game. Testing how lucky we are" AH YOU MUST TRY AND LEARN IT! It is fun! Anyone can give me the community address? LOL.
Well, pray for me and my midterm. Cum laude! :p
Sabtu, 02 Maret 2013
Thee Birthday--The Sequel
Hahaha to be honest I tend to delayed (again) my blogpost but...........okay, let's continue.
The celebration continued on the next day. Because my two-bestfriends can't make it at my birthday we met on the next day.
The celebration continued on the next day. Because my two-bestfriends can't make it at my birthday we met on the next day.
Rina special handmade (tab-made). Love youuu xxxxxx
Thank youu Nandut and Rio for the (finally normal) present xxx
Then the last one was with them! The craziest human being I've ever know LOL
Ica-Me-Mutiara-Nandra-Asin-Shasha
Thank youu for the present Nandra!
Aaaand the last one came from Risya! Thanks for the cupcakes! :**
This year birthday was a truly great birthday! I love them so much, the crazy part, the sweetest part, the freakest part, anything. I was blessed, wasn't I?
Can't wait for the next year!!
Late Event--Thee Birthday
Maybe it's a bit little too late (yeah, a month) for telling this story since I got a...well, much much things need to do first beside blogging. A busy head, remember? LOL.
Okay as all of you know (or don't care actually) I was born in 3rd February which I looove it so much because I can celebrate it in Malang. It is always on holiday, fyi.
This year's 3rd February, I had an event with Aremakara and because of it some of my friends who first want to meet me at home, they can't. Well for me it's a bit disappointment but I got some urgent errands in front of the day, right? Can't do anything.
First greet came from my mom of course, and my brother. Yes of course it wasn't Dina (no offense) haha. A simple greet, and I must go to SMANTI that morning. At lunch we celebrated it! Too bad Rina can't make it.
Okay as all of you know (or don't care actually) I was born in 3rd February which I looove it so much because I can celebrate it in Malang. It is always on holiday, fyi.
This year's 3rd February, I had an event with Aremakara and because of it some of my friends who first want to meet me at home, they can't. Well for me it's a bit disappointment but I got some urgent errands in front of the day, right? Can't do anything.
First greet came from my mom of course, and my brother. Yes of course it wasn't Dina (no offense) haha. A simple greet, and I must go to SMANTI that morning. At lunch we celebrated it! Too bad Rina can't make it.
Yes, mom gave me that huge-super-delicious cake.
To be honest that say I didn't expect any surprise from my friends since I have celebrate it with the gank (haha) a day before. Well, they had their own things to do.
They are so busy at 3rd February. Or is it me? Haha
The event were doing good, and in the afternoon (which I still didn't expect anything) Aremakara gave me surprise! A cake (which I forgot to take the photo) and THIS:
It's a banner. Huge one.
So surprised and happy of course! Thank you Aremakara! Especially the Sambel Sedep gang haha love you so much guys.
A little bit later Mutiara, Shasha, and Asin were really came to my house. We did a little celebration while re-memorizing all the super embarrassing stuff back then.
Lotta love and kisses from me for you guys xxx
Yes, this is their present. Hahaha
It continued on the night, Asider made appointment to hang out like usual and there, they gave me this:
ASIDER!
Which, in the end the cake ended in my face. In my face, at midnight, embarrassed me on the roadside. While Kampes was succeed to escape. Huf. Yes I have a new family with them! <3 div="">
These were my 3rd February. But of course it didn't stop here.Wait for the sequel!
Minggu, 13 Januari 2013
Suasana (nggak) menyenangkan
Bete.
Satu kata.
Padahal minggu ini banyak yang mau ke malang.
Bakal jalan, bakal seneng-seneng.
Nilai menghancurkan semuanya.
Padahal udah niat banget semester ini.
Kenapa sih.
Kenapa.
Bete.
Senin, 31 Desember 2012
Happy New Year 2013!
New year, new you! They said.
For me, it isn't always new but better.
And of course it is better 'better' than 'new' but restarting everything.
So, your new year, your choice!
And now I'm having NYE in Malang, sorrounded by my family and I care less about how fun my celebration but the most important is 'surrounded-by-family'
Haha
So, HAPPY NEY YEAR EVERYBODY!
2012 - Closed
I'm not really a normal blogger. Posting only when I feel want to, yah istilahnya agenda-limit lah bukan time-limit (mumpung aura eksplorasi masih ada dikit-dikit nih).
Well, reviewing my 2012 is not really that bad. In fact, there is no any bad condition nor situation like 2011. Actually, that's a same statement with: this year is flat and boring. Hahaha. But let's say, I'm thankful for time that given to me.
Come up with 2013 well, it's a little bit different. Yes I'm celebrate it in Malang! But th truth is, I feel less 'celebrating-feel' than last year, in Depok, with just 5 of us. Yah a little bit disapointed since I expect more than this. But there's no any better feeling than surrounded by your family, right? Right? Ha ha.
It gets worse since there aren't so many friends that available in New Year Eve (of course it is much rarer for available person to celebrate new year together haha) since they still on final exam! Huf bad timing, baaad timing. I love coming home, but............
Yah let's pray in next 5 hours I will do something with my family for celebrating new year. Fun of course. And not eating (my wish hahaha). I love celebration, I DO love.
Cheers!
Well, reviewing my 2012 is not really that bad. In fact, there is no any bad condition nor situation like 2011. Actually, that's a same statement with: this year is flat and boring. Hahaha. But let's say, I'm thankful for time that given to me.
Come up with 2013 well, it's a little bit different. Yes I'm celebrate it in Malang! But th truth is, I feel less 'celebrating-feel' than last year, in Depok, with just 5 of us. Yah a little bit disapointed since I expect more than this. But there's no any better feeling than surrounded by your family, right? Right? Ha ha.
It gets worse since there aren't so many friends that available in New Year Eve (of course it is much rarer for available person to celebrate new year together haha) since they still on final exam! Huf bad timing, baaad timing. I love coming home, but............
Yah let's pray in next 5 hours I will do something with my family for celebrating new year. Fun of course. And not eating (my wish hahaha). I love celebration, I DO love.
Cheers!
Sabtu, 20 Oktober 2012
Day Off, At Last
Finally, after 5 days of torturing it's day off! Literally off, because I'm just wake up, eat, read, watch tv, and sleep. No doubt 2 kg ahead for my weight. Hahaha
Jadi sekarang malem minggu. Bukan, bukan mau galau gara-gara masih jomblo atau apa, but it reminds me my real version of saturday night :(. Malem minggu di Malang. It means going out with my family. Ini bener-bener kerasa banget dibanding malem-malem minggu kemarin soalnya emang bener-bener puncak homesick. Inget banget jam-jam segini pasti udah pada siap-siap jalan cari makan atau main nemenin Iqbal. Huhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh bete.
Ditambah lagi ini tanggal 20, which means Rina di Grand Final Kakang-Mbakyu!! Aaaah bete dobel gimana nggak, she's my bestfriend. And in one of her really important time I'm not there :(. Bener bener bener pengen disana, ngasih support langsung, dan ngliat dia menang :(
Oh my God. Sumpah pengennya udah ga ketolongan yaTuhan :(. Really really sorry rin tapi situasinya kaya gini :(. Aku doain kok dari sini pasti! Dan aku bangga banget punya sahabat kaya kamu. Mau menang, mau ga you've done your best!
I really wish right now I'm in Malang, watch my best friend at her greatest moment with my family!
Tapi ya mau gimana, kondisinya gini. Coba kalo kemarin ga UTS pasti udah cabut pulang ke Malang. Ah hate this moment. Sebelnya ga ketolongan. Sebelllllllllll.
Hahah ini post isinya ngeluh mulu ya. Anyway, this post is dedicated to Rina. Good luck and done your best!! Ntar kalo udah menang aku bikinin post lagi deh hehehe.
Godspeed, Rin! You can do it!!
Jadi sekarang malem minggu. Bukan, bukan mau galau gara-gara masih jomblo atau apa, but it reminds me my real version of saturday night :(. Malem minggu di Malang. It means going out with my family. Ini bener-bener kerasa banget dibanding malem-malem minggu kemarin soalnya emang bener-bener puncak homesick. Inget banget jam-jam segini pasti udah pada siap-siap jalan cari makan atau main nemenin Iqbal. Huhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh bete.
Ditambah lagi ini tanggal 20, which means Rina di Grand Final Kakang-Mbakyu!! Aaaah bete dobel gimana nggak, she's my bestfriend. And in one of her really important time I'm not there :(. Bener bener bener pengen disana, ngasih support langsung, dan ngliat dia menang :(
"Coba kamu ada disini sumpah yaaaaa ini moment akbarku dan km gak dateng :"""")"
Oh my God. Sumpah pengennya udah ga ketolongan yaTuhan :(. Really really sorry rin tapi situasinya kaya gini :(. Aku doain kok dari sini pasti! Dan aku bangga banget punya sahabat kaya kamu. Mau menang, mau ga you've done your best!
I really wish right now I'm in Malang, watch my best friend at her greatest moment with my family!
Tapi ya mau gimana, kondisinya gini. Coba kalo kemarin ga UTS pasti udah cabut pulang ke Malang. Ah hate this moment. Sebelnya ga ketolongan. Sebelllllllllll.
Hahah ini post isinya ngeluh mulu ya. Anyway, this post is dedicated to Rina. Good luck and done your best!! Ntar kalo udah menang aku bikinin post lagi deh hehehe.
Godspeed, Rin! You can do it!!
Rabu, 17 Oktober 2012
Feliz Cumpelanoz Hapis!!!!!
00:00 and HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAFIZH HAIDAR!
Ciyeeee kepala dua, ciyee yang tu....eh mateng.
Semoga lulus langsung nikah sama (setidaknya mirip) sama Adi***
Sukses deh pissss ke depannya. Kita lulus bareng yah hahaha
Well, idk what must we do tomorrow for you, buat every simgle thing is just expression of how much we love you hahahaha. Jadi terima aja ya❤
Happy sweet twenty! Hahahaha ✌
Ciyeeee kepala dua, ciyee yang tu....eh mateng.
Semoga lulus langsung nikah sama (setidaknya mirip) sama Adi***
Sukses deh pissss ke depannya. Kita lulus bareng yah hahaha
Well, idk what must we do tomorrow for you, buat every simgle thing is just expression of how much we love you hahahaha. Jadi terima aja ya❤
Happy sweet twenty! Hahahaha ✌
Homesick part 2893847
Just miss my mom, sister, brother, whole family. Friends and stuff in Malang. Every single thing there. Suddenly wanna go home :(
Minggu, 14 Oktober 2012
Pitch Black
Pernah gasih ngrasa kalo tiba-tiba dari kehidupan yang tenang damai tenteram langung posisinya dipindah ke posisi yang serba salah? Pernah gasih ngrasa kalo tiap keputusan tindakan yang kita ambil itu bakal selalu nyakitin orang lain? Pernah gasih ngrasa kalo tiap usaha yang dilakuin dengan enaknya langsung dihapus kaya ga pernah terjadi gitu aja? Pernah gasih ngrasa kalo dituntut selalu menuhin ekspektasi orang lain? Pernah gasih ngrasa ga dianggep? Pernah gasih ngrasa hidup penuh rasa bersalah padaal ga salah apa-apa? Pernah gasih ngrasa kalo hasil yang pasti cuma gagal?
Pernah gasih, sekali, sekali aja coba posisiin diri sendiri di posisi orang lain?
Andai pernah, yakin ga itu udah sepenuh hati?
Kalo yakin, capek ga rasanya?
Kalo iya, jadi apa seharusnya tindakan yang diambil?
My wish is not much. Just back to normal. So why don't we?
Sabtu, 13 Oktober 2012
Approx. 32 Hours to Go
Jadi ini sabtu yang berarti dua hari lagi sebelum uts! 'Terus gue harus bilang wow gitu?' kalo ada yang komentar gini minta banget ditimpuk pake senda jepit hasil colongan mesjid.
Ini jaaaam yak sebelas dan Mitha bertekad nglembur buat belajar RE! Amazing, isn't it?
Jadi apasih RE itu? Berasa banget ada yang nanya, hahaha. Itu rangkaian elektroika, mata kuliah yang menurutku super duper susah soalnya emang gapunya dasarnya. Tau fungsi dioda aja ya barusan-barusan ini. Gitu mau tau aplikasinya semacam clipping, clamping, rectifier dan blablabla. Udah diniatin serius dari awal tapi kenapa makin kesini makin ga pede yah. Sistem ujiannya itu lisan loh btw, jadi selain otak disiapin, mental juga harus disiapin. Belom lagi kalo ntar pas nguji bapake bete. Makin fix lah kita sekelas ga lolos uts huf.
Seninnya itu. Selasa? Matematika teknik. Mungkin kalo dosennya Pak Eko aku bakal selow kaya gaada uts, tapi ini ridgun gitu. Soal yang dikasih berasa mahasiswanya semua punya kapabilitas *widih* setara sama anak MIT. Boro-boro nurunin rumus, apalin rumus satu biji aja tiga taun.
Lanjut Pengembangan Sistem Dijital. Lanjutan teji sih, tapi masalahnya: aku ga ngerti apa-apa! Yang dilakuin tiap kelas cuma ngliatin mupeng muka bapaknya. Hahahaha jijik norak abis. Tapi serius den, setengah semester ini sama sekali ga merhatiin bapaknya jelasin apa. Tolongggg.
Eh ke skip. Sistem Basis Data deng buat senin. Mungkin ga terlalu dipikirin, soalnya kata bapake boleh open semuanya. Book, e-book. Talking about e-book, otomatis aku pake ipet kan ya. Nah wifi nyala. Lajadilah kita ujian sambil browsing lalala. Semoga uts besok bisa gitu deccc doain!
Sebenernya ini. Posting depresi sih habis ngliat bahan RE yang super duper njelimet kata orang jawa. Mana banyak. Mana bahasa inggris. Cape kan ya? Tapi gamau tidur *ribet*
Yaudalah, I must go back to my book. Wish me luck everybodeeh!
Rabu, 26 September 2012
Term-3 Introduction
It has been a while since my last post, isn't it? A-----while. Hahaha. I'm not a very good blogger, yes I admit it.
Hmm tiba-tiba aja dari post yang terakhir tentang liburan, post yang sekarang udah hampir sebulan loh kuliah di tahun kedua. Yes, I'm in second year as an engineering student. Engineer. I never thought that I can go this far. Kesannya, yaaaah gimana ya, namanya kuliah sih kalo ga nugas-kepanitiaan-organisasi. Kayaknya buat yang ini start-nya terlalu menggebu-gebu deh. Soalnya ambil kepanitiaannya kayaknya ga disaring sama sekali jadinya banyak keteteran plus capek baat :(. Yah kan jadi curcol.
Buat akademik yaaa gitu-gitu aja sih. Namanya juga awal tahun, semangatnya masih beda sih. Masih rajin ke perpus, ngerjain tugas buat minggu depan, duduk di kelas juga masih di depan. Ntar coba deh berapa bulan lagi gitu, paling isi update-nya blog cuma cabut kelas hahahaha ih keliatan banget ya udah diniatin. Semoga enggaaak, semoga Mitha terus rajin dari sekarang sampe..........kapanpun.
Hal yang disadarin akhir-akhir ini tuh banyak banget komentar 'ih lo kaya emak-emak banget deh', 'mukanya emak banget sih', 'ih kan mirip emak gue'. Hahaha intinya I have transform as an 18-year-old-teenage-girl into 53-year-old-mother. Super cerewet, super rempong (katanya).
Lucu sih soalnya emang ga pernah sadar apalagi sengaja mau berkelakuan kaya emak-emak. Tapi.......yah the situation had beaten me into this kind of girl. What situation? Banyak, panjang, dan....melankolis. Hahaha jadi daripada melankolis-melankolisan gara-gara masalah ini mending gausah dibahas.
Hahaha padahal sendirinya tiba-tiba ngebahas.
Intinya (lagi), I'm a super serious person, and I always try to do the best in every segment of my life. Even if it doesn't have any means, or advantages on my self. Keluar deh sok bijaknya hahaha.
Visi. Kayaknya semakin kesini pegangannya udah mulai keliatan. Kenapa gitu, soalnya waktu tahun kemaren kayaknya kuliah: belajar, nugas, aktif di kampus; itu kaya ngawang gitu. Ga jelas sih emang soalnya susah dijelasin. Kaya apapun yang aku lakuin kemaren selalu diikutin pertanyaan 'emang aku belajar kaya gini ntar bakal dipake ya?' tapi sekarang udah kaya puzzle yang potongan-potongannya udah mulai kesusun. Tapi effort buat bener-bener tertarik sama dunia ini juga masih terus dikembangkan because it still in the state of not-100% hahaha.
Biarin ah panjang post yang ini. Masih pengen curhat.
Jadi minggu lalu aku dateng ke acara halal bi halal ikasmariagitma.
Awalnya sih niatnya cuma buat makan-makan (gratis), biasalah jiwa kosan. Plus ketemu temen-temen di jakarta selain UI. Plus pengen banget ngebacot pake bahasa jawa seharian. Uh homesick kan. Tapi, ternyata ga cuma itu.
Terkesan dan bangga. Dua hal yang bisa digambarin setelah dateng ke acara kemaren. Walaupun minoritas--arek Malang--disini senior-senior itu punya prestasi. Mereka sukses, dan punya status sosial di masyarakat Jakarta. Mereka berjuang, tentu, sebagai seorang pendatang disini dan akhirnya mereka dipandang. This is soooo inspiring! Because I realized I also have a chance to be like them! Dan acara kemarin udah berpengaruh besar ke semangat hidup (cieh) yang kayaknya udah makin redup hahaha.
I will be like them. Success. Happy. Have a great family. Dan tentunya ga pernah lupa akan identitas kita sebagai Arema :p
For the summary, now I start to 'wake up'. I'm a human. I will stand on my own feet in couple of years. Time to fight--hard--will come. Time will not forgive. Time will not be kind. Every single second is a treasure. If you fail, it won't back. If you fail there will not any return path. Sometime time is just mean. And I have promised to him to bring my family to a better and better state. And now, I just work at it. Wish me luck.
Hahaha ending super serius. Semoga bisa nge-post secepetnya deh. Ga 3 bulan juga kaya sekarang hahaha. Ciao!
Hmm tiba-tiba aja dari post yang terakhir tentang liburan, post yang sekarang udah hampir sebulan loh kuliah di tahun kedua. Yes, I'm in second year as an engineering student. Engineer. I never thought that I can go this far. Kesannya, yaaaah gimana ya, namanya kuliah sih kalo ga nugas-kepanitiaan-organisasi. Kayaknya buat yang ini start-nya terlalu menggebu-gebu deh. Soalnya ambil kepanitiaannya kayaknya ga disaring sama sekali jadinya banyak keteteran plus capek baat :(. Yah kan jadi curcol.
Buat akademik yaaa gitu-gitu aja sih. Namanya juga awal tahun, semangatnya masih beda sih. Masih rajin ke perpus, ngerjain tugas buat minggu depan, duduk di kelas juga masih di depan. Ntar coba deh berapa bulan lagi gitu, paling isi update-nya blog cuma cabut kelas hahahaha ih keliatan banget ya udah diniatin. Semoga enggaaak, semoga Mitha terus rajin dari sekarang sampe..........kapanpun.
Hal yang disadarin akhir-akhir ini tuh banyak banget komentar 'ih lo kaya emak-emak banget deh', 'mukanya emak banget sih', 'ih kan mirip emak gue'. Hahaha intinya I have transform as an 18-year-old-teenage-girl into 53-year-old-mother. Super cerewet, super rempong (katanya).
Lucu sih soalnya emang ga pernah sadar apalagi sengaja mau berkelakuan kaya emak-emak. Tapi.......yah the situation had beaten me into this kind of girl. What situation? Banyak, panjang, dan....melankolis. Hahaha jadi daripada melankolis-melankolisan gara-gara masalah ini mending gausah dibahas.
Hahaha padahal sendirinya tiba-tiba ngebahas.
Intinya (lagi), I'm a super serious person, and I always try to do the best in every segment of my life. Even if it doesn't have any means, or advantages on my self. Keluar deh sok bijaknya hahaha.
Visi. Kayaknya semakin kesini pegangannya udah mulai keliatan. Kenapa gitu, soalnya waktu tahun kemaren kayaknya kuliah: belajar, nugas, aktif di kampus; itu kaya ngawang gitu. Ga jelas sih emang soalnya susah dijelasin. Kaya apapun yang aku lakuin kemaren selalu diikutin pertanyaan 'emang aku belajar kaya gini ntar bakal dipake ya?' tapi sekarang udah kaya puzzle yang potongan-potongannya udah mulai kesusun. Tapi effort buat bener-bener tertarik sama dunia ini juga masih terus dikembangkan because it still in the state of not-100% hahaha.
Biarin ah panjang post yang ini. Masih pengen curhat.
Jadi minggu lalu aku dateng ke acara halal bi halal ikasmariagitma.
Awalnya sih niatnya cuma buat makan-makan (gratis), biasalah jiwa kosan. Plus ketemu temen-temen di jakarta selain UI. Plus pengen banget ngebacot pake bahasa jawa seharian. Uh homesick kan. Tapi, ternyata ga cuma itu.
Terkesan dan bangga. Dua hal yang bisa digambarin setelah dateng ke acara kemaren. Walaupun minoritas--arek Malang--disini senior-senior itu punya prestasi. Mereka sukses, dan punya status sosial di masyarakat Jakarta. Mereka berjuang, tentu, sebagai seorang pendatang disini dan akhirnya mereka dipandang. This is soooo inspiring! Because I realized I also have a chance to be like them! Dan acara kemarin udah berpengaruh besar ke semangat hidup (cieh) yang kayaknya udah makin redup hahaha.
I will be like them. Success. Happy. Have a great family. Dan tentunya ga pernah lupa akan identitas kita sebagai Arema :p
For the summary, now I start to 'wake up'. I'm a human. I will stand on my own feet in couple of years. Time to fight--hard--will come. Time will not forgive. Time will not be kind. Every single second is a treasure. If you fail, it won't back. If you fail there will not any return path. Sometime time is just mean. And I have promised to him to bring my family to a better and better state. And now, I just work at it. Wish me luck.
Hahaha ending super serius. Semoga bisa nge-post secepetnya deh. Ga 3 bulan juga kaya sekarang hahaha. Ciao!
Jumat, 01 Juni 2012
Infinite Boring
Dari judulnya aja udah ketebak sih ya kenapa nge-post. Ya, jadi ini boring dalam rangka belajar. Belajar di perpus pusat diniat-niatin ngansos tapi......sama aja! Kalo udah ketemu yang namanya fisdas yaudahlah say goodbye. I even don't have any of mind who can imagined that I will pass this hell-subject this semester :(
Tapi udah tau kenyataannya gitu eh malah akhirnya asik nge-blog. Inilah manusia. Hahaha. Don't blame me, blame the wifi. Hmmm things get better and better. Kayaknya semua kembali ke jalur masing-masing dan situsi yah kembali seperti semula. Walaupun butuh pengorbanan tapi aku ga nyesel kok milih begini. Aku dan semua orang nyaman, dan that is the best conclusion right. Jadi ini tanggal 2 Juni yang berarti I will catch my Malang city in 24 days! I miss it and I mean it. Keluarga temen musuh semuanya deh kangen hahaha.
Sukanya jadi mahasiswa nih, 4 bulan dipush sampe gila terus liburannya 3 bulan. Oh what a life. Tapi ya gitu itu, mau ngapain ya segitu lamanya di Malang. Tapi gausah dipikir, toh ntar pasti malah ngrasa liburannya kurang hahaha. Well, ketemu yang disana berarti ga ketemu juga sama temen-temen disini. Berat rasanya, soalnya mereka udah kaya keluarga disini. Yang selalu temenin, tempat curhat, belajar, jalan, semuanya bareng-bareng lah. Seneng banget rasanya punya temen-temen yang punya kepribadian beda tapi gatau darimana akhirnya bisa bareng-bareng terus kaya gini. Semoga sampe 3 tahun mendatang semuanya bakal berjalan kaya gini ya.... Yap udah jam 2 dan....harus kembali ke fisika. Wish me can get through my final week smoothly, okay? Dan semoga hasil semester ini ga turun-turun banget dari semester lalu :(
Tapi udah tau kenyataannya gitu eh malah akhirnya asik nge-blog. Inilah manusia. Hahaha. Don't blame me, blame the wifi. Hmmm things get better and better. Kayaknya semua kembali ke jalur masing-masing dan situsi yah kembali seperti semula. Walaupun butuh pengorbanan tapi aku ga nyesel kok milih begini. Aku dan semua orang nyaman, dan that is the best conclusion right. Jadi ini tanggal 2 Juni yang berarti I will catch my Malang city in 24 days! I miss it and I mean it. Keluarga temen musuh semuanya deh kangen hahaha.
Sukanya jadi mahasiswa nih, 4 bulan dipush sampe gila terus liburannya 3 bulan. Oh what a life. Tapi ya gitu itu, mau ngapain ya segitu lamanya di Malang. Tapi gausah dipikir, toh ntar pasti malah ngrasa liburannya kurang hahaha. Well, ketemu yang disana berarti ga ketemu juga sama temen-temen disini. Berat rasanya, soalnya mereka udah kaya keluarga disini. Yang selalu temenin, tempat curhat, belajar, jalan, semuanya bareng-bareng lah. Seneng banget rasanya punya temen-temen yang punya kepribadian beda tapi gatau darimana akhirnya bisa bareng-bareng terus kaya gini. Semoga sampe 3 tahun mendatang semuanya bakal berjalan kaya gini ya.... Yap udah jam 2 dan....harus kembali ke fisika. Wish me can get through my final week smoothly, okay? Dan semoga hasil semester ini ga turun-turun banget dari semester lalu :(
Senin, 21 Mei 2012
Clues
Bukan rahasia kalo karma itu ada. Setiap apa yang kita berikan ke orang, pasti selalu ada timbal baliknya. Ga cuma hal baik, begitu juga buat hal-hal yang nyakitin. And it will happen to me, sooner or later.
Bukannya bermaksud mellow atau apa, tapi masalah kaya gini selalu pingin dituangin di blog. Mungkin kaya blog ini jadi media buat ngobrol sama diri sendiri. Mungkin. Haha aneh ya.
Hal kaya gini terjadi lagi. Mungkin ini salah satu bentuk karma dari yang dulu-dulu aku lakuin sama orang-orang yang sayang sama aku. Disaat aku bener-bener nyoba buat sayang sama orang lain, hal kaya gini selalu aja terjadi. Iyasih, masalah yang selalu terjadi yang terus keulang berarti nandain kalo ada yang salah dan harus dibenerin dari diri sendiri. Tapi bahkan aku gatau sebenernya apa yang terjadi, apa sebenernya yang aku rasain, kaya apa aku gatau. Susah banget rasanya punya perasaan yang bener-bener sayang sama orang lain, kaya nemuin 'the one' yang bakal aku sukain luar-dalemnya, baik-buruknya, semuanya.
Aku selau iri sebenernya sama orang yang bisa ngasih apapun buat orang yang disayangin, iri karena mereka punya perasaan sebesar itu sama orang lain. Atau emang dasarnya aku gapunya hati ya? Pantes aja berarti kalo suatu saat ak bakal jadi perawan tua. Hahahaha boong deng. Sebenarnya orang yang aku cari itu orang yang punya dua hal: pertama bisa nerima aku apa adanya; kedua dia adalah orang yang aku bisa percaya dan seratus persen bergantung sama dia. Dan sayangnya belum ada orang yang kaya gitu. Apa emang ketinggian ya? Dari pengalaman yang terakhir sih, aku selalu jadi yang dewasa. Selalu jadi yang ngalah. Selalu mendem semuanya. Kenapa? Karena menurutku kalo dua-duanya sama-sama keras kepala yang ada mah, tengkar mulu. Kapan jadinya. Tapi perasan yang dipendem itu bukan buat selamanya. Suatu saat pasti keluar. Dan hasilnya pasti negatif. Sekarang aku ngulangin lagi. I always be the bad person. Peran cewek jahat yang tiba-tiba masuk ke hidup orang dan tiba-tiba juga seenaknya pergi. Maaf, tapi aku selalu bertindak sama kata hati. Kalo suka ya suka. Kalo nggak ya udah, selesai. Aku tau itu egois, tapi yah namanya perasaan. Makanya jangan suka kaya cewek kaya aku hahaha *berasa ada yang nyukain*.
Buat kamu (yang aku tau gabakal baca ini juga) pesenku cuma satu, cintai seorang cewek apa adanya dia. Ga semua hal yang kamu anggep bener, bener di mata orang. Itu aja :) Setidaknya beberapa hari belakangan ini ak seneng. Seneng banget malah. Ada yang dipikirin, ada yang perhatiin haha. Ada pelajaran yang diambil setiap kejadian, whether it's bad or good. Tentunya buat kejadian saat ini juga. Secara ga langsung mendewasakan diri kita, at least for me. Yaudah segini dulu curhatan ala anak SMA-nya *berasa ada yang baca* semoga ke depannya bakal baik-baik aja. Wish every thing goes well, for me and you.
We are still friend right? Hahaha kata-kata singkat, ironis, bullshit, tapi menenangkan. Ciao!
Hal kaya gini terjadi lagi. Mungkin ini salah satu bentuk karma dari yang dulu-dulu aku lakuin sama orang-orang yang sayang sama aku. Disaat aku bener-bener nyoba buat sayang sama orang lain, hal kaya gini selalu aja terjadi. Iyasih, masalah yang selalu terjadi yang terus keulang berarti nandain kalo ada yang salah dan harus dibenerin dari diri sendiri. Tapi bahkan aku gatau sebenernya apa yang terjadi, apa sebenernya yang aku rasain, kaya apa aku gatau. Susah banget rasanya punya perasaan yang bener-bener sayang sama orang lain, kaya nemuin 'the one' yang bakal aku sukain luar-dalemnya, baik-buruknya, semuanya.
Aku selau iri sebenernya sama orang yang bisa ngasih apapun buat orang yang disayangin, iri karena mereka punya perasaan sebesar itu sama orang lain. Atau emang dasarnya aku gapunya hati ya? Pantes aja berarti kalo suatu saat ak bakal jadi perawan tua. Hahahaha boong deng. Sebenarnya orang yang aku cari itu orang yang punya dua hal: pertama bisa nerima aku apa adanya; kedua dia adalah orang yang aku bisa percaya dan seratus persen bergantung sama dia. Dan sayangnya belum ada orang yang kaya gitu. Apa emang ketinggian ya? Dari pengalaman yang terakhir sih, aku selalu jadi yang dewasa. Selalu jadi yang ngalah. Selalu mendem semuanya. Kenapa? Karena menurutku kalo dua-duanya sama-sama keras kepala yang ada mah, tengkar mulu. Kapan jadinya. Tapi perasan yang dipendem itu bukan buat selamanya. Suatu saat pasti keluar. Dan hasilnya pasti negatif. Sekarang aku ngulangin lagi. I always be the bad person. Peran cewek jahat yang tiba-tiba masuk ke hidup orang dan tiba-tiba juga seenaknya pergi. Maaf, tapi aku selalu bertindak sama kata hati. Kalo suka ya suka. Kalo nggak ya udah, selesai. Aku tau itu egois, tapi yah namanya perasaan. Makanya jangan suka kaya cewek kaya aku hahaha *berasa ada yang nyukain*.
Buat kamu (yang aku tau gabakal baca ini juga) pesenku cuma satu, cintai seorang cewek apa adanya dia. Ga semua hal yang kamu anggep bener, bener di mata orang. Itu aja :) Setidaknya beberapa hari belakangan ini ak seneng. Seneng banget malah. Ada yang dipikirin, ada yang perhatiin haha. Ada pelajaran yang diambil setiap kejadian, whether it's bad or good. Tentunya buat kejadian saat ini juga. Secara ga langsung mendewasakan diri kita, at least for me. Yaudah segini dulu curhatan ala anak SMA-nya *berasa ada yang baca* semoga ke depannya bakal baik-baik aja. Wish every thing goes well, for me and you.
We are still friend right? Hahaha kata-kata singkat, ironis, bullshit, tapi menenangkan. Ciao!
Jumat, 18 Mei 2012
Campuslife
Akhirnya ngepost juga setelah lama mati suri. Ralat. Akhirnya inget juga kalo punya blog hahaha. Yes I am back jengjeng.
Campuslife. Setelah bertahan sekian bulan. Setahun dua hari tepatnya sebagai mahasiswi resmi universitas indonesia, sekarang semester dua di teknik koomputer, masih mencari jati diri *lebay*. Hm....dua semester disini, banyak banget pelajaran baru yang didapet. Mulai dari udah kebiasa buat hidup sendiri, ritme belajar di ui yang super sekali, pergaulan mulai dari yang so high school sampe yang so jakarta, banyak lah.
I am so grateful to Him for giving this chance for me. Aku cuma bisa ngebayangin kalo di Malang apa aku bakalan se-mandiri ini, se-tangguh ini. Menurut orang lain mungkin tinggal di luar kota-sendiri-mandiri sesuatu hal yang biasa. Tapi menurutku engga. Banyak banget tambahan pikiran yang harus......dipikir. Dan hal-hal yang terjadi disini, baik buruk, susah seneng, merupakan proses penggambaran dunia yang sesungguhnya nanti setelah lulus. Haha apaan sih serius amat ya.
Tapi balik ke second-term-things, khawatir banget sama nilai :((( aku ga yakin bakal lulus cumlaude. Bahkan aku ga yakin fisdas bakal lulus. Alin? Don't ask. Yap saatnya serius. Saatnya belajar!
Apapun yang terjadi, aku bangga ngejalanin hidup ini. Segala kekurangan yang diberikan itu dijadikan pelajaran. Dan kelebihan yang ada itu bonus dari Tuhan :) once again, thanks for giving me this chance, God :)
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